Christian Slogans

For your own personal amusement today, please read some rather humorous Christian slogans from  American-Evangelicalism.

“No God — No Peace. Know God — Know Peace.”

“Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!”

“Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins.”

“Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!”

An ad for St.Joseph’s Episcopal Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, “For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets.”

“Have trouble sleeping? We have sermons — come hear one!”

“People are like tea bags — you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.”

“Come in and pray today. Beat the Christmas rush!”

“When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out alright.”

“Sign broken. Message inside this Sunday.”

“Fight truth decay — study the Bible daily.”

“How will you spend eternity — Smoking or Non-smoking?”

“Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives”:

“Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world.”

“It is unlikely there’ll be a reduction in the wages of sin.”

“If you’re headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.”

“If you don’t like the way you were born, try being born again.”

“Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.”

“This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing? U R”

“Forbidden fruit creates many jams.”

“In the dark? Follow the Son.”

“Running low on faith? Stop in for a fill-up.”

“If you can’t sleep, don’t count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd.”

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4 Comments on “Christian Slogans”

  1. Jodi says:

    Now THAT is a good time! Thanks man =) My fave was the “ch__ch. What’s missing?” one

  2. Matt H says:

    There’s a church down the street with a sign that reads:

    FREE COFFEE
    FREE WI-FI
    FREE SALVATION

  3. golleth says:

    Contentment is knowing God. True happiness means believing and following the will of God

  4. james says:

    Where I live there are some horrible ones. ….Jesus is the bread of life, check Him out before you toast…….To hear from God, call B-I-b-l-e…….I cant help but throw up a little every time I pass. This is continual. Every few weeks I have to endure another one. Sure makes me want to run, not come in. In the very least ,its cheesy, in the very most, ‘s blasphamy


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